Travel Advice from an Abrasive Millenial
This was my ~maiden voyage~ flying to mainland Europe, because even analogies about ships crossing oceans must somehow reference women and ~coitus~
If I could change anything, I would’ve skipped Nice and gone straight from Paris to Florence to spend more time in either city. The French Riviera is beautiful, but is more of its own separate vacation. Overall, France and Italy are super ugly and you probably shouldn’t go.
Keep it simple, stupid.
Picture, if you will (just fucking do it), the super fluffy, neon, Day Glow colored, stacked 10 miles high gelato stands on the perimeters of famous European churches, river fronts, or central squares. Gelato is supposed to be, uh, ~frozen~, so you should be concerned if the gelato you’re looking at is stacked so high without melting. Also, they just keep adding that stuff on top to make it look worth of an Instagram post, but you’re actually served the old stuff at the bottom. Its genuinely full of weird chemicals to prevent it from melting and tastes like cold butt fungus.
